Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Epilogue

Epilogue – 2 Years Later


The reporter was excited. This was the biggest interview of his career. Bon Jovi had just released a new album and his editor had picked him to talk to them. He was also a fan and he hoped he didn’t make a fool of himself. Facing all five of them he took a deep breath.

“Your new album is a bit of a departure from your last two. It appears that you’ve returned to your roots, so to speak - very emotional ballads, big arena anthems, incredible guitar solos. Yet the lyrics still tell the stories all your fans love. Happy, positive, hang in there, you can have it too stories. And it has a real rock feel to it. What do you attribute this to?” He asked Jon.

David answered. “He’s in looove!”

They all laughed. Jon blushed but smiled as he played with his wedding ring. It was still shiny.

“Ah, yes, the new wife. Congratulations on the twins by the way. I hope everyone is doing well.” The reporter offered.

“Yes, they’re well thanks. The twins are growing like weeds.” Jon beamed with obvious pride.

“That makes six now right? Are you done or are you going to have more?”

“That’s completely up to my wife.” Jon grinned. “Although, Kristen and Luke were a bit of a surprise, so she may want to wait a bit before making that decision.”

“I may sound stupid, but I have to ask...what does your wife have to do with the sound of this album?” The reporter was curious.

Jon smiled. “She convinced me that we could write a song that told a story but put a solid rock beat to it. And she said she missed the big guitar solos. I think she got sucked into that one by Richie though.”

“She just has great taste in music!” Richie retorted.

“Wait a minute. We’re talking about Lindsay here right? Your conservative, CSI, lab tech, crime fighting wife?” He asked incredulously.

Richie hooted. “You don’t know her very well. She may look conservative, but she’s a rocker chick at heart.”

He looked to Jon for confirmation. Who nodded. “If she’s in the mood and the right song comes on she can head bang with the best of them. In fact, when she listened to the draft versions of this album she threatened that if I didn’t amp it up she was leaving me for Steven Tyler.”

The reporter laughed. “Well I have to say she did well. Number one on the charts in North America, Europe, South America and Australia. It looks like life is good for Bon Jovi.”

“Yeah.” Jon said. “It is.”

Chapter 64

For the next week and a half, Lindsay was kept very busy. Her cases at work had picked up so she was putting in longer days, and spent what was left of her evenings trying to sort through her apartment and begin packing. She’d given her landlord notice, but she still had no clue what she was going to do with all of her furniture. She’d spent a lot of time searching for the right pieces that fit the theme and mood she was striving for. She was very proud of what she’d put together, but it wouldn’t suit Jon’s house.

She was sitting looking around her living room when her phone rang. Looking at the window she smiled.

“Hi, handsome.”

“Hi, beautiful.” He chuckled. “How are you?”

“Honestly? Tired, frustrated, did I mention tired? And I miss you.” She answered.

“Still not sleeping well?” He asked.

She sighed. “It’s better. I would never have believed it could take so long to get used to sleeping alone again. Of course if I was able to spend a little more time in bed it might help.”

“I know, I keep reaching for you in the middle of the night. What’s keeping you so busy that you’re not getting enough rest?” The frown was evident in his voice.

“Well, trying to figure out what I’m going to do with all of my furniture and stuff for one thing.” She replied.

“Bring it with you.” Was his solution.

“It doesn’t go with your house.” She argued.

“So change the house. Besides it’s our house now. I want you to be comfortable there. I’m not particularly attached to anything there. It’s mostly Dorothea’s style not mine. I’m not sure I have a style. I just like things that are comfortable and don’t look ratty.” He paused. “But furniture placement can’t be what’s keeping you awake at night. What else is going on?”

“Oh, it’s just work. We’ve been really busy lately with a multiple that we haven’t been able to catch. It’s driving us all nuts.” She tried to keep her voice light. She didn’t want to have to explain what the case was – she knew how he’d react.

He wasn’t fooled by her tone. “Multiple what? What’s the story?”

“You don’t really want to hear all the grisly details. What did you guys do today?” It was an off day for them and they were in San Francisco.

“Hung out at the Wharf, went for a cruise around the bay, ate too much seafood. But let’s get back to the original subject. Yes I do want to know all the grisly details. I want to know about everything that affects you. I know that your job is stressful and often emotionally disturbing. You need to talk about it if you’re going to maintain your sanity. I want you to be able to talk to me about anything and everything. Let me be your rock. Now spill!” He urged.

When he put it like that she couldn’t not tell him. “It’s a multiple rapist. He preys on women who live alone and holds them at gun point. They come home from work to find him already inside. The last two he’s beaten up pretty good. But he’s smart. He wears gloves and a condom. We’re getting no DNA evidence and very little trace. His attacks are getting closer together and more violent. It’s very frustrating.” Closing her eyes she waited for his reaction. It wasn’t long in coming and exactly what she expected.

“I’m calling Kevin to see who we can send to stay with you. I want you to stay at the estate from now on. We’ll move your stuff when I get home.” He started issuing instructions.

“Jon stop.” She interrupted him. “This is why I didn’t want to tell you the specifics. I don’t need a bodyguard. I’m not in any danger. He can’t come with me to crime scenes anyway. I’m at the estate more than I’m not already, but I need to get this stuff packed up. The landlord would like to show the apartment, and he can’t if I’ve got half packed boxes all over the place. I appreciate your concern, really, but I’ll be fine.”

“Are you saying that I don’t have the right to be concerned?” He asked. She could hear the anger in his voice.

“Not at all. I’m just trying to reassure you that you don’t need to be. I don’t go to any scene alone, and the police always clear everything before we get there. My apartment building is secure. There’s no reason for any criminal to connect me with their case anyway. By the time they know I’m involved, they’ve already been arrested. So, while I understand why you might be worried, there’s really no reason for you to be.” She explained.

He sighed and she could almost see him raking his hand through his hair. “Ok, no bodyguard – for now, but I don’t like it. You can give me all the assurances in the world, but I’m still going to worry. I feel an overwhelming need to protect you.”

“I understand that. If the situation were reversed, I’d feel the same way. I promise not to take any unnecessary risks and to always have someone with me. Ok?” She coaxed.

“I guess. Just promise me you’ll be careful.” He pleaded.

“I will. I promise.” She assured him.


The next afternoon she was sitting at her desk going over the reports again – they had to be missing something, when Brian stuck his head in.

“We got another call Lindsay.” He informed her.

“Same guy?” She asked.

“Looks like.” He replied grimly. “Mark and Sheila are heading to the hospital to collect trace and talk to the victim – if she can. You and I will take the crime scene.”

Nodding, she rose to join him. As they headed to the scene she slapped her knees in frustration. “We’ve got to get this guy!”

“We will.” He assured her. “Sooner or later he’s going to make a mistake, and we’ll get him.”

Greeting the police officer standing at the front door, they entered the house. The living room showed obvious signs of a struggle. There was blood spattered over one wall and puddled on the floor by the sofa.

“I’ll start here.” Brian stated. “Why don’t you check upstairs to see if there’s more there?”

Lindsay nodded, pulled out her flashlight and carefully walked up the stairs. Checking rooms as she went, everything looked undisturbed. Ending her circuit at the master bedroom, she walked through to check the ensuite bathroom. Seeing nothing out of place she turned to head back downstairs to help Brian.

Re-entering the bedroom she was suddenly shoved from behind. Sprawling on the bed she rolled over to see a man standing in front of her with a gun in his hand pointed at her.

“Bitch! You should have stayed downstairs. Now you’re going to have to pay, just like those other whores. You all think you’re too good for a man. You need to be put in your place. You should be home raising babies and making a home for your husband. But no, you’re too good for that! You have to go out and take jobs away from the men that deserve them! I bet you have to be on top too, don’t you! Well, not today bitch! Today you’re going to beg me for it, and then I’m going to teach you how to properly treat a man.”

Fighting the panic rising inside her she frantically tried to think of some way to alert Brian.

“Oooh, so you like it rough do you? I’m up for that. Where do you want it? Here, on the bed? On the floor? Maybe up against the wall?” Standing up her heart pounding she started slowly removing items of clothing, starting with her boots.

“What are you doing?” he growled.

“I thought you wanted to teach me a lesson. This is how you do it, isn’t it? Through sexual dominance? Well, I like to play too.” She threw first one boot, then the other against the hallway wall – hard.

“Stop!” He shouted. He was obviously shocked by her behaviour and unsure how to proceed.

“Oh, so you want to undress me then? Well, let me just get my kit out of the way.” Picking up the aluminum case she pitched it through the open doorway where it hit the opposite wall with a loud crash.

Realizing the noise she was making he raised the gun and pointed it at her. “Shut up or I’ll kill you now.”

“Lindsay? Are you okay?” Brian’s voiced drifted up the stairs.

She opened her mouth. The man raised the gun higher and yelled. “Don’t!”

Her scream was drowned out by the blast of the gun.



Chapter 65

Jon and the guys had just come off the stage and hit the showers. It had been another great show. As much as he loved it, he was grateful for another off day the next day before the final show of this leg in Vegas. He was looking forward to being home for awhile – or more accurately, he was looking forward to being with Lindsay. The ring Richie had helped him pick out a few days ago was packed safely in his suitcase and he could hardly wait to see her face when she saw it.

They were getting ready to head out when his phone rang. Looking at the window he smiled – a little in relief. Regardless of what she said he worried about her in her chosen profession. Granted, most of the crime in their area was fairly minor – robberies, B&E’s, that kind of thing, but this current case had his protective instincts screaming.

“Hi honey, how are you?” He answered.

“Mr. Bongiovi?” A man’s voice asked.

Jon froze. “Yes, who’s this?”

“This is Brian – Lindsay’s boss.” He answered.

“Where is she? Has something happened to her? Why are you calling on her phone?” He could feel panic rising. The guys stopped and looked at him.

“I’m calling on her phone because I didn’t have your number, but I figured she’d have it programmed in. I calling because I thought you would want to know. Lindsay’s in the hospital. She’s been shot.” Brian didn’t know how else to tell him.

Jon’s knees buckled. Richie and David caught him, and lowered him into a chair Hugh moved over. “WHAT! Is she okay? How badly is she hurt? How did it happen?”

Exchanging glances the guys all grabbed chairs and sat to wait to hear what was going on.

“She’s alive.” Brian assured him quickly. “She took the bullet in her shoulder. She’ll be in the hospital for a few days, but she’ll be alright.” He hesitated. “I don’t know if she told you about the case we’ve been working on.”

“The serial rapist? Yes, she did….oh God no.” Jon covered his face with his free hand.

“No, no she wasn’t raped.” Brian said. Jon released a relieved breath. “We were at the home of his latest victim. I was processing evidence downstairs and Lindsay went upstairs to take a look around. The police had assured us they’d cleared the house, but apparently he’d been hiding somewhere upstairs. He confronted Lindsay and threatened her with rape. She managed to hold him off long enough to gain my attention. When he heard me coming, I think he panicked. That’s when he shot her. When I entered the room he turned on me, but I got a shot off first. He’s dead.”

“Thank God.” Jon replied, then his anger broke through. “Dammit! I told her I had a bad feeling about this case. She promised me no unnecessary risks! She promised me she’d be careful!” He took a deep breath. “What hospital is she in?”

Hanging up with Brian, he quickly filled the guys in as he hollered for Paul and started dialing the phone.

Paul stuck his head in the door. “You bellowed?”

“I need to fly home – tonight, immediately.” Jon bit out. “Hi Mom, hang on a minute.” He turned back to Paul. “Lindsay’s been shot. I’ll be ready to take off in half an hour.”

“I’m going with you” Richie stated.

“Me too.” David spoke up. Tico and Hugh nodded.

Paul nodded. “Ok, I’m on it. Is she ok?” He asked.

“She will be.” Jon answered. He spoke into the phone. “Mom? Lindsay’s been shot. She’s in the hospital.” He explained as much as he knew about what happened. “Her boss said she’ll be ok, but I don’t think she should be alone. We’re on our way back, but it’s going to be a few hours.”

“Say no more.” Carol interrupted him. “I’m on my way. I’ll call you when I get there and get an update from her doctor. What hospital is she in?”


Lindsay lay in a hospital bed in a drug induced haze. The pain killers they had given her had reduced the agony to a dull ache, but also dulled her mind. Her memory of what happened up until she heard Brian calling her was clear, but then everything became very fuzzy. She did know that she came very close to dying. If the shooter had been even a little bit less panicked, his arm wouldn’t have been shaking so bad and his aim would have been straighter.

And she would be dead. Just when she was finally finding some happiness. It made her start to seriously reassess her life. But first she needed to get some sleep and clear her head.

When she opened her eyes again, she saw Carol sitting in a chair beside her bed.

“What..? How?....” She was confused.

Carol smiled reassuringly. “Jon called me. He didn’t want you to be alone. He’s on his way. How are you feeling? Can I get you anything?”

Lindsay shook her head. “My shoulder hurts, but the drugs keep it to a dull roar. Other than that I’m fine. I am a little confused though. How did Jon find out?”

“Your boss called him. Have you talked to your parents? Do you want me to call them?” She offered.

“Thanks. Would you mind? I’m not sure I’m up to trying to convince my mother that I’m not at death’s door and she doesn’t need to come flying down here to take care of me.” She didn’t have the energy. Besides she wanted some time alone. She needed to think.

“No problem. And don’t begrudge her her concern. She’s a mother, she’s entitled. But I think I can assure her that we will take good care of you.” Writing down the number Lindsay gave her she headed out of the room to find a phone.

Alone again, at least for a few minutes, Lindsay reflected on her life, her goals, her priorities. She had started making changes a year ago. Maybe it was time to make some more. Maybe it was time to grab for that brass ring.



Chapter 66

She must have dozed off again, because when next she opened her eyes, the sun was shining through her window.

Turning her head she smiled a greeting at Carol, who was once again sitting beside her bed. She opened her mouth to speak when they heard a commotion in the hallway.

Carol listened for a moment then grinned and patted Lindsay’s hand. “Sounds like the boys have arrived.”

She was right. Within minutes, Lindsay’s room was overrun by five very tired, but relieved looking men.

While the others approached Lindsay, Carol held Jon back. “Don’t you go taking out your anxiety on her. She’s been through enough without having to deal with your temper.”

“Hey darlin’. How are you feeling?” Richie asked as he bent down and kissed her forehead.

“Like I’ve got a fire burning in my shoulder, but other than that I’m fine.” She answered with a smile.

“Does it hurt really bad, do you want me to get a nurse to get you something for it?” David asked with concern.

She smiled and motioned him closer so that she could kiss his cheek. “No, it’s okay for right now. The drugs are great for the pain, but they make my mind fuzzy and a little disoriented. I really don’t know why people would pay to feel like that.” She shook her head.

“You gave us quite a scare nina.” Tico told her sternly, kissing her cheek. “Don’t do that again.”

“I didn’t exactly plan on doing it this time!” She retorted. “Believe me I don’t intend on doing it again.”

“Didn’t you know that wearing the superman symbol doesn’t make you bulletproof?” Hugh joked and kissed her as well.

“NOW you tell me!” She said in an exasperated tone.

They all laughed – except Jon. He was the last to approach her. The others moved to give him room. She watched him warily. He stood there for a long moment just looking at her, taking in her bandaged right shoulder and pale face. The muscle in his cheek twitched.

“Are you going to yell at me?” She asked cautiously.

He didn’t answer.

Reaching out with her uninjured arm she grabbed his hand and squeezed it. “Hey, I’m ok.” She assured him softly.

Sitting on the edge of the bed he leaned down to carefully wrap his arms around her. “Oh God Lindsay, I thought I’d lost you! I don’t know what I’d do if you were taken from me!”

The movement hurt her, but she ignored the pain. She had come so close to never feeling his arms around her again, that she just wanted to stay like that forever. She bit back her protest when he finally released her and sat up. They both had tears in their eyes. Neither one noticed that the others had left to give them time alone.

“What happened to ‘no unnecessary risks’? What happened to being careful?” He asked in a deceptively calm voice.

“I was careful. The police had assured us they’d cleared the house. I don’t know where he was hiding that they didn’t find him.” She defended herself. “I’ve never been so scared in my life. I was afraid that Brian wouldn’t hear me, that I was going to be raped and killed….that I would never see you again….” Her voice trailed off into a sob.

Her tears and obvious fear dispelled his anger, and tore at his heart. Lying down beside her, careful not to jar her shoulder, he smoothed the hair back from her forehead and kissed the tears from her face.

“Ssssh, sweetheart. I’m here. Nobody’s going to hurt you.” Stroking her hair and her cheek he waited for her to calm enough to talk. “Tell me everything.”

He held her and comforted her while she got it all out. When she finished he fought to control his temper.

“I’m glad the bastard’s dead.” He ground out.

“Me too.” She let out a hiccupping sigh, and fought to keep her eyes open.

Noticing, he kissed her gently. “Get some rest honey.” She gripped his arm. “I’ll be right here, I’m not going anywhere.” He assured.

When she woke again he was still there, holding her gently, dozing himself. Smiling, watched him sleep. He must have felt her stare, because he opened his eyes and smiled back at her.

“Hey there.” She whispered.

“Hey.” He whispered back.

A nurse came in then interrupting them. Stopping when she saw Jon lying on the bed with Lindsay she frowned at him. “Now don’t you be going and jostling that shoulder around. She’s in enough pain. You’ll have her back again hale, hearty and good as new in no time if you just leave her alone and let her heal.”

“Yes ma’am.” He said meekly, sitting up and trading the bed for a chair.

Lindsay’s chuckle was cut off by a gasp as she tried to sit up straighter. Immediately, both Jon and the nurse were at her side to help her.

“Thanks, I’m ok now.” She leaned back against her pillow.

When the nurse had finished checking her over and left, she turned to Jon. “So how was the show last night?” They talked about the tour, the guys, her moving in, the kids, all kinds of things. When the candy striper brought in her dinner, she brought one for Jon too.

“Thanks Jenny.” He said reading her name tag. The young girl blushed and rushed out the door.

Lindsay laughed. “And yet another female heart falls to the Bon Jovi charm.”

He laughed. “The kids wanted to come see you, but I told them to wait until you got home. They agreed to delay my birthday celebration until you’re home.”

She nodded. “That’s probably a good idea. By then I’ll be off the heavy painkillers and my head won’t be so fuzzy. I’ll be able to enjoy it more.”

“I thought you were supposed to enjoy fuzzy.” David stated from the doorway, a bouquet of flowers in his hand.

“Is that why you keep your hair looking like that?” Jon inquired with a grin. David flipped him off.

Lindsay laughed. “Don’t listen to him, I know for a fact there’s a lot of fans out there who love your curls. The flowers are beautiful. Thank you.”

He sat the flowers on a cabinet, walked over and kissed her cheek. “You’re looking better already.”

Minutes later they were joined by Tico and Hugh. The four men set out to entertain her and keep her mind occupied and off her pain. She fleeting wondered where Richie was, but figured he must be sleeping, or maybe visiting his mother.

Finally, the nurse came in to shoo them all out. “Don’t you be getting her all worked up now! It’s nice that you came to keep her company, but she needs to rest and to heal now. You can come see her tomorrow, but for now….shoo!”

Lindsay struggled to hold back her laughter as she said goodnight to David, Tico and Hugh and watched the three men walk meekly out of the room. “I wish the public could see this!” She chortled. When Jon raised a questioning brow at her she explained. “Four rockstars meekly obeying orders without a word.

He grinned. “Well, she’s a little scary!”

“Who’s scary?” Richie asked from the doorway.

“The nurse. Watch out for her. She likes to give orders.” Jon warned him.

“It’s okay, I just talked to her and told her the night shift had arrived. She said she’d bring me a blanket and a pillow.” Richie replied.

Jon frowned. He opened his mouth, but Lindsay beat him to it. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m here to stay with you tonight so that Jon can go and get some sleep.” Richie explained.

“Yeah man, about that. I know that’s what we agreed to, but I think I’ll just stay here. I slept a bit earlier, so I’m good.” Jon began.

“No.” Lindsay said, her voice firm. “You need to go get some sleep. You have to do a show tomorrow in Vegas. And you may have dozed earlier, but you didn’t really sleep.” She looked at Richie. “And you don’t need to stay here either.”

“I don’t want you left alone tonight.” Jon frowned. She was right about him only dozing earlier, but what she didn’t seem to remember was the number of times she woke him, crying in her sleep or clutching at him and calling his name. He didn’t want her waking from a nightmare and finding herself alone.

“Jon, they’re going to give me a sedative anyway. I’ll be out until morning.” She explained patiently. “There’s no reason for either one of you missing out on sleep. I’ll be fine.”

“And I’ll be fine right here with you.” Richie replied, holding up a hand when she would have argued. “Give it up Lindsay, I’m not leaving. Now, say goodnight to Jon and tell me if you want to watch some T.V., or read or talk or just sit quietly.”

Realizing that for all of his easy going, joking ways, this big man could be quite stubborn and immovable when it came to what he thought was best for those he loved, she gave in gracefully, kissed Jon goodnight, and selected a movie to watch.


Chapter 67

The day that Lindsay was released from the hospital she was up and dressed early. She couldn’t wait to get out. If she had to stay there another day she was sure she’d lose her mind. Her shoulder still hurt, but if she sat perfectly still, she could actually get some relief from the pain. She was off the heavy drugs, but still needed painkillers regularly.

When Jon showed up to get her she wanted to walk out herself, but the nurse insisted that she had to be taken to the door in a wheelchair. “Hospital policy” She was told. Grumbling she sat in the chair and kept telling Jon to go faster.

“Relax, honey, if I go any faster we might have an accident and then you’d have to stay here.” He warned her. She stopped grumbling.

Arriving at the estate, Jon rushed around to her door to help her out and into the house and settled on the couch in the den, before heading out to bring in her bag.

“Lindsay!” She looked up as the kids came running into the room.

“Hi guys!” She hugged Steph and Jesse.

“Hey watch her shoulder!” Jon reminded them. Lifting Romeo up, he sat him on her left side. “Stay on this side ok buddy?” The toddler nodded and snuggled in close to her.

Jake knelt on the cushion on her right side and very carefully leaned in to kiss her under Jon’s watchful eye. Then he sat back and looked hopeful. “Can we give Daddy his birthday presents now?”

She smiled. “Sure,” Motioning Stephanie to her she whispered where she had hidden her present for Jon and asked the teenager to get it for her.

Sitting back, she quietly watched Jon and his children. When Romeo climbed up on the couch next to her again, she wrapped her arm around him and hugged him close. She loved these family times, but they were hard for her. His children had welcomed her with open arms and she loved them, but she was painfully aware that she would always be ‘Lindsay’, never ‘Mom’. She thought she’d accepted that she’d never have children years ago, but sometimes – like now with Romeo cuddled close – she felt a pang of longing.

The little boy squirmed around until he could pluck at her sling. “Owie?”

“Yes sweetie, that’s my owie.” She answered and showed him her bandage. She had to blink back tears when he leaned forward and kissed it. “Better?” He asked. Hugging him with her good arm she kissed him. “Yes, it feels much better, thank you sweetie?”

Looking up she saw Jon watching them with a gentle smile and eyes full of love.

Later that day she was sitting watching the kids. Steph was flipping through a magazine, Jesse was playing a video game, and Jake and Romeo were building a Lego tower to the moon – if it didn’t fall over first, which it had twice already. She didn’t notice Jon watching her.

Sitting down beside her, he picked up her hand and laced their fingers together. “You ok? Do you need a pill, or a rest?”

“No thanks, I’m fine.” She smiled and laid her head on his shoulder.


When he entered their bedroom that night he found her standing by the balcony doors, staring at the stars, lost in thought. Walking up behind her, he slid his arms around her waist and pulled her gently back against him.

“Penny for your thoughts.” He murmured in her ear.

“Oh, they’re worth a whole lot more than that.” She replied. “They’re worth the whole word.”

“Tell me.” He urged.

She struggled to put her thoughts into words. “Coming that close to dying made me re-evaluate my goals in life and my priorities. I had finally found some happiness, and it was almost taken away. My focus has always been my career and my family – or to be more exact, my brothers’ families.” She paused, and took a deep breath, coming to a decision. “I think I need to make some changes.” She felt him stiffen slightly and patted his arm and leaned back further against him.

“I’m going to talk to Brian about getting out of the field and working in the lab full time. I’ve got all the qualifications, the hours are better, and there is less chance of contact with the bad guys, but I can still help people. The pay is less, but I can live with that.”

He snorted. “Yeah, I think we can manage. I have to tell you honey, that this makes me feel a whole lot better. I know you love your job, and I wanted to be supportive, but frankly, it scares the hell out of me.” He paused. “Any other changes you want to make?”

“Actually, yes.” She hesitated, opening and closing her mouth several times, unsure how to broach the subject with him.

“Come on honey, it can’t be that bad.” He could sense her anxiety.

“You know that I love the kids, right?” She began. He nodded. “For so many years, family to me has been my parents, my brothers, their wives and their children. I’ve never had a family of my own. I never had the chance, and I thought I had accepted that I never would.” She paused and grabbed her courage with both hands. She had no idea what his reaction would be. “I’d like to have a child of my own. I wouldn’t try to displace the other four. I… I just… I’d like to know what it feels like to nurture a child within my body. To feel it kick and grow. I’d just like to know that there would be some part of me – of us - left behind when my time comes. It may be too late for me anyway, but I’d like to try. But I understand if you don’t want to have anymore ……”

Turning her to face him he shushed her with a finger to her lips. “Hold that thought. Wait just one minute.”

She watched him walk to his dresser and take something out of the top drawer, but she couldn’t see what it was.

“First of all, you can have as many children as you want. Thirty-nine isn’t too old any more. There’s still time. I’ll do my best to keep up my end. But…I think…maybe…” He stopped, suddenly nervous. He laughed softly. “This isn’t how I’d planned to do this, but this seems like the right time.” He blew out a breath and dropped to one knee. Holding out the box he’d been holding in his hand he flipped it open. She gasped. “Lindsay, I love you with all my heart and soul. You brought light and love back into my life when everything was dark and cold. You restored my faith in love and in myself. You bring me joy and happiness. I can’t imagine my life without you in it. I want to make you happy and keep you safe for the rest of your life. Will you marry me? Will you share my house, my children, my life? Will you let me share yours? Will you let me help make all of your dreams come true? Will you be my wife, my partner, my rock? Will you let me be yours?”

She could hardly speak for the tears clogging her throat and running down her cheeks. It was the most beautiful ring she’d ever seen. The huge marquise cut diamond had two sapphires on either side and was set in yellow gold. It was perfect.

“Oh Jon, it’s beautiful! And the sapphires! You remembered.” She whispered in awe.

“Honey? You’re killing me here!” He pleaded.

She smiled through her tears. “My answer is yes. Yes, I’ll marry you. Yes I’ll let you share my life. Yes I want to share yours. Yes, I want you for my husband, my partner, my rock. I can’t imagine my life without you either. You made me believe in me, that I was worthy of being loved. When I thought I would spend the rest of my life alone, you pushed your way in and wouldn’t leave. You made me a part of your family. I love you with everything that I am.”

Rising, he slid the ring on her finger, gathered her carefully in his arms and kissed her with all the emotion he was feeling. She accepted it, absorbed it, and returned it.

She’d left her home, her family and her country to start a new life. She found love and a family of her own. I guess I did the right thing!

Chapter 61

The next day Lindsay was sitting idly scanning the interview schedule while she was waiting for Jon to finish. Suddenly an idea hit. Glancing at the clock she let the idea grow and formulate into a plan. Grinning, she rose to wait outside the room where they were doing the interviews.

Luck was with her. Richie escorted the interviewer out of the room. Lindsay motioned him to silence. He stepped into the hallway and closed the door.

“What’s up Linds? We still have one more interview.” Richie reminded her.

“Yeah, I know. Is Jon in there still? Alone?” She asked, a little nervous now that the moment was at hand.

“Yeeah. What’s going on in that devious little mind of yours?” He’d noticed her blush and knew she was up to something.

“The next interview is in about five minutes right?” She ignored his question. He nodded. “Can you give me that five minutes alone with Jon?”

He grinned. “Sure darlin’. I’ll guard the door.”

“Thanks.” She grinned back as she entered the room and closed the door behind her.

Jon looked up when the door opened. He was sitting in a chair with a low coffee table in front of him. Matching chairs sat beside him and across the table. “Hey honey. Just one more and I’ll be done.” He smiled at her.

She smiled back at him and sat on his lap. “I know. But since you have a few minutes now, I just wanted to remind you not to schedule anything on your birthday celebration day.” Since he had been on the road for his birthday they had decided to celebrate it with the kids the day after he got home from this leg of the tour. “I know you’ve been talking to Craig about meetings, and I thought I should remind you of our plans.”

Leaning down she traced the contour of his ear with her tongue, blew in it and bit softly on his earlobe. She chuckled when he shivered.

“Uh, honey…as much as I love what you’re doing , I do have another interview to do, and…” Her mouth swallowed the rest of his words.

When her hand opened his shirt his shirt to caress his chest he groaned and tightened his hold on her. Reaching further she stroked him through the fabric of his chinos. The loose fit of the pants allowed her to grip him with her fingers and squeeze.

Breaking the kiss he let his head fall back and moaned. “Jesus, sugar. You’ve got to stop…they’re going to walk in any minute.”

She just chuckled and moved her mouth to his neck, kissing, sucking and nibbling on his exposed adam’s apple. Her hand never stopped it’s playing.

A discreet knock at the door had her standing up and examining her handiwork. He was flushed, his breathing slightly laboured, and his eyes had darkened and dilated. Sweat had gathered on his upper lip, and the light material of his pants couldn’t conceal his reaction to her ministrations.

He followed her gaze. “Dammit Lindsay! Look what you’ve done to me!”

Chuckling, she headed to the door where she turned and looked back at him. “I warned you. Payback’s a bitch! Now you can experience how embarrassing it is for others to see that you can’t control the desire that burns between us!”

Opening the door she smiled and nodded to the female interviewer standing there with Richie. Looking over Lindsay’s head, Richie took one look at Jon, looked back at Lindsay and started laughing. “Remind me never to piss you off!”


She was sitting in the dressing room chatting with David, Tico and Hugh when Jon and Richie walked in.

“How’d it go?” She asked innocently.

“Long and painful.” Jon responded in a voice just short of a growl. “Just like you planned.”

“Why? What she’d do?” David asked, sensing a good story.

“Let’s just say that the writer for the entertainment section of the local paper saw first hand what an ‘upstanding’ guy Jon is thanks to Lindsay.” Richie replied.

They all turned and stared at her.

“What?” She asked trying not to smile.

“You’re evil.” Jon informed her.

She grinned. “You learned a valuable lesson though didn’t you?”

They all nodded. “Never piss you off!” They chorused. She laughed.

Walking up to Jon she wrapped her arms around his waist, looked up at him and kissed his chin. “Still love me?”

Sighing, he closed his arms around her and kissed her nose. “Yes, and no more ‘branding’. I promise.”

“I don’t mind the bites, just make sure they won’t show.” She smiled.



Chapter 62

Lindsay woke the next morning tired, and a little sad. This was her last day on the tour. She was flying back to Jersey the next morning. Rolling over she snuggled closer to the warm body beside her. He hugged her close. The alarm on his cell phone went off.

She groaned. He chuckled, stretched and yawned. “Come on honey. Plane’s waiting.”

“You’re the boss, can’t you delay take off for a couple hours?” She grumbled.

Brushing her hair back from her face he kissed her firmly. “No. I want to have some time to show you my favorite places in Denver.” It was an off day for them. They were flying to Denver today so that they could adjust to the altitude before the show tomorrow. He shook her gently. “You can sleep on the plane.”

She cracked an eye open to look at him. “If I try out the bed on that plane it had better be for something besides sleeping.” He grinned.

The day was cold and rainy. Denver was going to be even colder. In defence she pulled on a pair of jeans and a Giants sweatshirt so old it was faded and soft and cozy, but it was still warm.

Jon looked at her and smiled. “Been raiding my closet again I see.”

She shrugged. “It’s so warm and cozy. I love it. It’s perfect for a day like this.”

Wrapping his arms around her he hugged her and kissed her softly. “That it is sweetheart.”

Boarding the plane she took a seat and fought a yawn. Once they reached cruising altitude and the seatbelt sign went off, Richie turned to her. “Why don’t you go have a nap Linds. You look like you’re about to fall asleep sitting up.”

“I don’t know how you guys do this for months on end. I’ve only been doing it a week and I’m exhausted!” She shook her head.

He shrugged. “You get used to it. Seriously though, there’s a bed back there. We’ll wake you in an hour or so.”

Getting up and walking down the aisle she glanced at Jon who winked at her as she walked by. Entering the bedroom, she took off her boots and jeans, curled up under the blankets and was asleep within minutes.

She didn’t know how long she’d been asleep, but she was awakened by a hand sliding up under her sweatshirt to cup a breast. She felt his breath in her ear just before his mouth latched onto her earlobe and bit gently. Murmuring in appreciation she rolled onto her back, opened her eyes and smiled at him. Raising her arms she helped him remove her sweatshirt. Her bra quickly followed as did her panties. She was pleased to discover he was already naked.

“You’re quick.” She commented, reaching out to pull him down to her.

“We don’t have a lot of time. We land in about 45 minutes.” He replied before capturing her lips with his.

While he teased her mouth with his tongue his hands were busy teasing her body. One kneaded her breast, while the other slid between her thighs to gently rubbed her sensitive nub.

Moaning softly, she arched her back trying to increase the contact between their bodies. Pressing one hand between them, she caressed his chest, his abs, reaching to take him in her hand. Gripping firmly, she stroked.

Groaning, he slid two fingers deep inside her, moving them in and out to prepare her. Feeling her wetness, he quickly replaced his fingers with his hardness…..and held still.

Gasping at his sudden entry, she clutched at his arms, arched again and shuddered. “Jon!”

“Sssh, you have to be quiet. This room isn’t soundproofed.” He murmured.

His words barely registered. Her mind was completely focused on the feel of his hard length buried deep inside her, unmoving, pulsing against her soft flesh. Unable to help herself, she began undulating against him.

Pushing up to the full length of his arms, he watched her writhing beneath him. He loved the way she looked lost to passion. But her movements soon broke through his control, and he started to move.

Wanting to feel his weight she tugged at his arms until he gave in and lowered himself completely. Moaning, biting her lips to hold back her cries, she wrapped her legs tightly around him and urged him to move faster.

Knowing she wouldn’t be able to keep quiet when she climaxed, when he felt her tighten around him he covered her mouth with his and inhaled her orgasmic scream, quickly following her two thrusts later.

Raising his head, still panting he looked down at her. “Welcome to the club.” She chuckled.

After cleaning up and dressing, they rejoined the rest in the main cabin. David searched her face and smirked. “Feeling better?”

“Much.” She smiled. Not even the threat of David’s near constant teasing could diminish her ‘floating on a cloud’ feeling.


After they had settled into the hotel, Jon took her on a tour around the city, showing her his favorite places. When they arrived at the restaurant for dinner, they had a drink at the bar while they waited for their table.

“Hey Jon!” A voice called out.

Turning Jon smiled at the man approaching them. “Hey man! I’ve been trying to call you!”

“I know, I’m sorry, my life’s been just crazy lately. I got your message and I figured you’d be here at some point tonight, so when I was in the neighbourhood I thought I’d give it a shot.” Came the reply.

After shaking hands, Jon turned to introduce them. “John I’d like you to meet my girlfriend Lindsay Chandler. Honey, this is John Elway.”

She really couldn’t resist. “Hello Pork Chop.”

Both men groaned. Lindsay grinned.

“God, I’m never going to live that down am I?” John shook his head.

“Hey, I loved those videos! They were great!” She insisted. “But I’m telling you both right now….there will be no football played in my house. You want to play outside, fine, I’ll even cheer you on, but not in my foyer!” She winked.

They chatted for awhile, and Jon and Lindsay invited John to join them for dinner, but he had another engagement.

“Are you going to be in Philly when we come to ‘crush’ you?” John asked Jon.

“Ha ha. I’m not sure. I’m trying, but Paul’s giving me grief about the promo schedule.” Jon replied.

“Don’t worry. If Jon can’t be there, I’ll keep you company. I’ll even let you sit in the owner’s box with me.” Lindsay offered, grinning.

“You like football?” John asked, surprised.

“I like arena football.” She qualified. “I’ll watch the outdoor game, but I find it a little slow and boring.” She waited for the reaction from the Hall of Famer.

John stared at her for a moment, saw the twinkle in her eyes, and turned to Jon with a sympathetic look. “You are a braver man than me, my friend.”

“Why?” Jon asked surprised.

“This one’s going to keep you on your toes. Beautiful, bright, likes football…so what’s she doing with you?” He shook his head. “I don’t get it.”

She shrugged. “He writes a good love song.”

They all laughed.



Chapter 63

Sighing, Lindsay laid her head on the back of her seat and waited for the movie to begin. She wasn’t even halfway home yet and she missed him like crazy. Last night had been great. After dinner they had headed back to the hotel. They were going to have a drink in the bar, but seeing the guys already there, decided they wanted to spend their last few hours together alone. They’d spent the rest of the night making love, cuddling and talking quietly. It had been heaven in the Mile High city.

Saying goodbye that morning had been hell. Jon had wanted to go with her to the airport, but she insisted he stay at the hotel. She thought it would be easier that way. She’d managed to hold back the tears and smile when she took her leave of the guys, but when Jon had taken her in his arms by the car, she hadn’t wanted to let go.

“Ssshh honey, it’s only for a couple weeks, then I’ll be home for a whole month.” He had tried to comfort her. “By the time we leave for Europe, you’ll be so sick of me, you’ll drive me to the airport yourself.”

She had smiled. “Oh, I doubt that. For some reason, I can’t seem to get enough of you.”

He had grinned. “I know the feeling sweetheart. Now have a safe flight and call me when you get home.” He had kissed her gently. “I’ll miss you sugar.”

“I’ll miss you too.” She’d whispered. Then she climbed into the car before she lost control completely.

Sighing again, she forced herself to think about all the things she needed to do when she got home – all the mundane chores like cleaning and laundry – and it was back to work for her tomorrow. She should also check in with Stephanie and the boys sometime this week to finalize plans for Jon’s birthday celebration. Making lists in her head she dozed off, waking just before landing.

Back in her apartment, she unpacked and started the laundry while she gave it a good cleaning, with Jovi blaring from the stereo in the background. It took her longer than usual because so many songs now had new memories attached and she’d have to stop and remember.

Checking the clock she figured she could catch him before they went on stage and grabbed the phone.

“Hey honey.” He answered.

“Hi. I know you’re about to go on stage. I just wanted to let you know I’m home safe and sound.” She assured him.

“Ok, good. I was starting to get worried. You’re right, we’re about to go on. I’ll call you after the show.” He promised. “I love you.”

“I love you too. Bye honey.” She replied.

“Bye.” He hung up.

She tried to watch some T.V., but she ended up just surfing the channels. Nothing was capturing her interest. It was getting late and she knew she should get some sleep, but her body was still on Colorado time, and she wasn’t really tired.

She decided to go to bed anyway and read for awhile. That usually did the trick. Not this time. After an hour, she got up and wandered restlessly around her apartment. She knew what the problem was, but didn’t want to admit it. Finally, she roamed into the bathroom for the umpteenth time and stared at herself in the mirror. “Oh who are you kidding?!” She asked herself with a shake of her head.

Giving up, she quickly packed a bag and headed out the door.

The ringing of her cell phone woke her.

“Hello?” She answered a little groggily.

“Hi honey. I’m sorry did I wake you?” He asked.

“It’s ok. How did the show go?” She burrowed down in the bed and held the phone close.

“Pretty good. The fans here are a little nuts. It must be the altitude.” He answered wryly.

“Who are you kidding? You love it.” She laughed.

“Yeah, I do.” He admitted. “So you’re in bed?” He wanted to be able to create a picture of her in his mind.

“Actually,” She paused. “I’m in your bed.” She held her breath, hoping he didn’t ask what had brought her there. She wasn’t sure how to explain it herself. She definitely wasn’t going to tell him she was wearing his t-shirt and had fallen asleep clutching his pillow.

There was silence for a minute. “Good. That’s where you belong.” He wasn’t going to ask why. He didn’t care as long as she was there.

“So where are you?” She asked trying to picture it.

“Still in the dressing room waiting for David. Then we’re heading back to the hotel for the after party.” He answered.

“Did Elway show up?” He was going to try.

“Yeah, but he left a few minutes ago. He said he’d call you about the game in Philly.” He informed her reluctantly. “I’m still not sure I like that idea.”

“Why?” She asked puzzled. “What are you worried about?”

“Well, I have to admit I’m a little afraid of you two getting together when I’m not there to defend myself – or break up the fight.” He admitted.

She laughed. “Well then I guess you’re just going to have to work hard to make sure you’re there.”

“I’m trying darlin’, I’m trying.” He chuckled. “Oh, here come the guys. I guess I’d better go. Try and get some sleep. I’ll call you tomorrow.” His voiced lowered. “I miss you.”

“I miss you too. A lot.” She murmured blinking back the tears. “Say hi to the guys for me. Try and find David a woman. Then he’d have a reason to spend so much time in the bathroom.”

He laughed. “I’ll do my best. Talk to you tomorrow honey. I love you.”

“’Night Jon. I love you too.”

“’Night honey.”

Closing the phone she laid it on the night stand, pulled his pillow closer and drifted off to sleep.


In Denver, Jon closed his phone and shoved it in his pocket. Looking up he caught Richie grinning at him.

“What?” He asked.

“When are we going ring shopping?” Richie smiled.

“What are you talking about?” Jon tried to brush him off.

“Come on man. This is me. I know you. You’ve got it bad, and you won’t be happy until she’s a permanent part of your life. Frankly I couldn’t be happier for you. She’s beautiful, bright, caring, compassionate, has a great sense of humour, isn’t overwhelmed by you and your lifestyle, loves your kids, tolerates us – what more could you want? Are you honestly going to stand there and tell me you’re not sure? That you’re not madly in love with her?” Richie demanded.

Jon smiled and shook his head. “No, I’m not….I can’t” He paused thinking. “How’s Wednesday? We’ll be in L.A. and you can take me to that jewelry store you told me about.”

Chapter 58

Everything came to a head in Chicago. They had flown in the night before due to morning interviews, which suited Lindsay just fine. She loved Chicago, even though she’d only been there once before. She was looking forward to a few hours exploring Navy Pier and shopping on the Mile.

When she finally arrived at the arena they had already started the sound check. Rushing down the hallway she almost collided with Chad.

“Whoa, there Lindsay. Slow down before you hurt yourself.” He laughed.

“Hi, Chad. I’m sorry. I’m late and I wasn’t watching where I was going.” She apologized.

“No harm, no foul.” He assured her.

As they walked into the stage area together, she heard Obie call for Richie to try something. Sitting down, she looked at Jon and waved. He didn’t wave back.

“Where the hell have you been?” He demanded into the mic to be sure she heard him.

Raising one eyebrow at his tone she answered. “Shopping. Wait until you see what I got the kids. I found the cutest little outfit for Romeo…”

“You’re late.” He interrupted.

“Hey man, don’t do this.” Richie warned him. Jon ignored him.

“You know I want you here before sound check.” He bit out.

Facing another of his moods, her patience snapped.

“Hey! Don’t play the temperamental rockstar with me Jon! I know what you look like in the morning.” She turned to Richie and changed the subject. “Come on Swingman, show me what you can do.”

Richie immediately started into a heavy riff and everyone breathed a sigh of relief when Jon let it go.

When they were finished, Lindsay caught Richie’s eye. Understanding what she wanted he hung back pretending to be checking something on one of his guitars. When the others had left he went and sat beside Lindsay.

She sighed. “I’m sorry Rich, I don’t want to upset things before a show, but I can’t take this anymore. What the hell is wrong with him? I ask and ask, but he won’t talk to me. Is this normal for him on the road, or is there something wrong?”

He raked a hand through his hair. “No, this isn’t normal for him. I guess maybe I should have said something to you sooner, but I was hoping that he’d pull his head out of his ass on his own.” He paused. “He’s jealous, and he’s not dealing with it well.”

She frowned. “Jealous of who?”

“You and Chad.” He replied. When she just stared at him incredulously, he nodded. “I know, he’s seeing things that aren’t there, but you need to understand where he’s at right now. He was never jealous of Dorothea, never dreamed that she’d cheat on him and you, more than anyone, know how that worked out. So now there’s you. He’s crazy in love with you and determined not to have it fall apart this time because he wasn’t paying attention.”

She shook her head in disbelief. “But I have never given him any reason to think that I would cheat on him…..have I? My God Richie, he is my life! What would I want with anyone else when I have him?” Her eyes widened. “Is this because of that comment I made the night I arrived about having a thing for frontmen and that I thought Chad was hot?”

Richie sighed. “That started it. He took it more seriously than you meant it. After that, he saw you talking to Chad…at the after parties, sitting here during sound check…and his imagination ran riot. I told you he’s never had to deal with jealousy before and he’s not doing a good job of it. Deep down he knows you love him, but there’s that part of him that’s watching for your attention to turn elsewhere.” He frowned. “And to be honest, I’m not sure Chad’s intentions are innocent.”

She looked at him in surprise. “What makes you say that?”

He shrugged. “Just a feeling I get when I see the way he looks at you. And you see the way he and Jon are with each other.”

She snorted. “Yeah, talk about testosterone overload! But at least now I know why.” She sighed. “So how do I convince Jon that I love him and only him?”

“I don’t know how to help you there Linds. I guess, just talk to him…and stay away from Chad.” He advised.

When she entered the dressing room Jon stared at her. “Where’ve you been?”

“Calm down, she was helping me.” Richie answered before she could. Jon grunted and opened a bottle of wine.

Lindsay sat in a chair and watched him. She’d never been in a situation like this before and never dreamed she would be with him. She figured she would be the one having to deal with feelings of jealousy. Part of her was flattered that he would actually be jealous of her. Part of her was angry that he didn’t trust her, although she could understand why he was little apprehensive where fidelity was concerned. So…how was she supposed to reassure him?

She became aware that everyone was shooting her expectant glances. Well, that’s nice. They all expect me to fix this, but I don’t see anyone jumping in with any ideas as to how!

With a sigh, she stood and went to pour herself a glass of wine. Turning she stood in front of Jon, and gazed at him, lost in thought, not really aware of what she was doing. When he looked up their eyes locked and she saw her own pain and uncertainty reflected in his. She felt the tears building up and she blinked them away.

Seeing the wetness in her eyes Jon sighed, uncrossed his legs and opened his arms.

Accepting his invitation she sat on his lap and curled into him. “You know I love you, don’t you?” She asked him quietly.

He nodded. “Yeah, I do, and I love you too.” He kissed her softly. The tension in the room eased.



The show was excellent as usual, but Lindsay’s mind wasn’t really into it. She was still trying to figure out a solution to their problem. When she heard the opening strains of Lie To Me her head jerked up to look at Jon in horror. His eyes were closed as he sang into the mic. Shifting her gaze to Richie she raised her brows. He just shrugged. She loved the song and it was on her favorites list, but for him to pick it tonight seemed too much of a coincidence. Oh my God! Does he really think I’m lying about how I feel? That I’m pretending? If that was the case, she had a bigger job ahead of her than she thought!


When they arrived at the after party she still hadn’t figured out what to do. She also didn’t realize how much Jon had had to drink. She was returning from the bar with a drink when Chad stopped her.

“Come on babe, dance with me.” There was a dance floor to the side and a D.J. was playing some decent tunes.

She smiled, but shook her head. “Hey Chad. No thanks, I’m really tired tonight. I just want to sit and relax.” She took a step toward the table when he grabbed her arm to stop her.

“Ah, come on Lindsay. Just because he’s in a foul mood, doesn’t mean you can’t have some fun.” His voice lowered. “I’ll show you a good time. You’ll like it, I promise.”

Now she was a little uncomfortable. The feeling got worse when she saw, out of the corner of her eye, Jon get up from the table and start towards them. Shit! Now’s it’s really going to hit the fan!”

“Chad, let go of my arm. Look, I’m sure you could, but…” She didn’t get any further

“Get your hand off my woman before I remove it for you.” Jon demanded, slurring just slightly.

“Hey man, I don’t see a ring on her finger, and the way you’ve been behaving lately, I figured she might be ready to spend some time with someone who’ll treat her right and show her a good time.” Chad retorted belligerently.

“Oh get real! The only thing you want to show her is your bed!” Jon sneered.

“Well, she might like a man young enough to do it, not just write about it.” Chad jeered.

“STOP IT! BOTH OF YOU!” She yelled. Turning to Chad she frowned. “Look Chad, I’m flattered, really, but I love Jon. I’m not interested in ‘having a good time’ with anyone else. So why don’t you go try your luck with one of those pretty young things eyeing you from the bar over there.”

“Are you sure?” He asked flicking a withering glance at Jon.

“Yes, I’m sure.” She responded firmly.

As he sighed and walked away she spun around and glared at Jon. “And you! I…I don’t even know what to say to you!” At the end of her rope, she took a step toward the table wanting to get away from him before she said something she’d regret. He grabbed her arm and roughly pulled her back.

“Did you fuck him Lindsay?” He growled.

“What? Of course not! Are you serious?!” She was astounded.

“Did you?!” She gave her arm a shake. “Does he have a big cock? Does he make you scream louder than I do?” He continued.

“Jon, you’re drunk. We’ll talk about this tomorrow.” She tried to pull away, but he wouldn’t let go.

“TELL ME! Does he know how you like to be dominated? Does he know how you like your breasts caressed, and your nipples licked? Does he know how you like it deep and hard?” The anger in his face made her heart sink. “Can he make you come as easily as I can? Did he make you beg for it?” He ground out.

Anger, fear, pain, all converged in her. She slapped him. “DAMN YOU JON!” Breaking his hold and bursting into tears she ran out of the bar.


Chapter 59

Lindsay stood on the balcony of her room, oblivious to the cold air. She didn’t feel it. She didn’t feel anything really. She was numb. A knock at the door had her turning with a sigh. She knew it wasn’t Jon – there’d been no attempt to open the locked door. She had a pretty good idea who it was, but checked the peephole to be sure before opening the door.

“Better be careful Rich or he’ll accuse me of sleeping with you too.” She warned him bitterly.

He sighed as he entered the room. “He’s drunk.”

“I know. It’s the only reason I’m still here.” She replied.

“I’m glad you are. I was afraid you might have run off. No one would have blamed you if you had.” He sat down on the couch and urged her to sit too.

“I thought about it.” She admitted. “But I promised myself when I agreed to give this relationship a try that I would give it everything I had. And that means not running away when things get tough. So I’ll stay and talk to him – when he’s sober, and then we’ll see.”

Richie smiled in relief. “Good. If it’s any consolation, I think you shocked him half sober when you slapped him. He just kept saying ‘I can’t believe she did that’.”

She snorted. “He’s lucky that’s all I did. My first impulse was to use my knee.”

He winced and stood up. “I’ll be sure to tell him that – when he’s slept it off and can better appreciate your restraint. Well, I’ll let you get some rest. I just wanted to see how you were doing.”

She smiled and walked him to the door. “Thanks Rich.” She paused. “Will you do me a favour? Keep him in your room tonight? I’ve had about as much of his drunken accusations as I can stomach tonight.”

He nodded sympathetically. “I don’t think the boys would let him anywhere near you tonight anyway. Tico wanted to deck him. We actually had to hold him back.”

She smiled. “I’ll have to remember to thank him. ‘Night Rich.”

He hugged her. “’Night Lindsay.”



Lindsay watched out the window as dawn lit the sky. She’d showered, but she hadn’t slept. Thankfully, they didn’t have to travel anywhere today – they were doing a second show tonight. She was wrapped in a robe sipping coffee when she heard his key in the door. Turning from the window she watched him enter the room.

He looked like death warmed over and she hoped he was enjoying his hangover. She saw him look first towards the bedroom, and upon seeing the made up bed, glance around until he saw her. His expression was a mixture of relief, fear and pain. This was the first time she had ever seen him nervous. If she was honest with herself, there was a part of her that took some satisfaction in that. It also gave her hope that they could work through this.

He blew out a breath. “Will you sit and hear me out?”

She nodded and sat in one of the chairs flanking the couch and continued sipping her coffee. Jon paced for a few minutes then sat on the end of the couch nearest her, rested his elbows on his knees and raked a hand through his hair.

“First of all I want to apologize. I should never have said those awful things to you. They were unfounded and you didn’t deserve it. I was drunk – I know that’s not an excuse, I just...” He paused. “I know nothing was going on with you and Chad. I know that you love me and I believe you would never intentionally hurt me. Dorothea blamed what happened on me never being around…not paying enough attention to her. I was determined that I would do better this time. But I went overboard and I know it.” He raised his head and looked her in the eye. “Lindsay, I love you, and I’m so sorry for the way I behaved, and if you will stay with me I promise it will never happen again. I just want to make you happy.”

She looked at him for a long moment. “You hurt me Jon. It was more than just the horrible accusations you hurled at me. You didn’t trust me. I knew something was bothering you, but you didn’t even trust me enough to talk to me about it! It wasn’t that long ago that you were upset with me for not having faith in you, and now here you are doing the same thing…only worse because I hadn’t known you very long at that point. You keep saying that you love me, but you don’t trust me. How can this relationship work without trust? I understand why you’re a little leery, but if I’m supposed to have faith in you despite my past, then you have to have faith in me despite yours.” She took a sip of coffee. “The man I’ve been dealing with the last few days is not the man I fell in love with. I want that man back. This other man I don’t even like very much.”

He nodded. “I know. I have no excuse. I didn’t even recognize myself sometimes.” He raised tear filled eyes to hers. “Will you give me another chance? I never meant to hurt you. Lindsay, I do love you, and despite recent behaviour, I do trust you. I trust you with my life, my heart, my children. I love you, I want you, I need you! I can’t imagine my life without you in it. I don’t want to.”

Her own tears were running freely down her cheeks. “You have to promise me that the next time you’re worried about something, or you’re upset, or just not sure about something, you will talk to me about it. No more letting it fester and having it erupt like it did last night. You made me believe that we had something special. You made me believe that you thought I was special. You ripped my heart out last night Jon. I don’t ever want to feel like that again.” Her tears turned into sobs.

He jumped up to lift her into his arms. Sitting again he cradled her on his lap rocking her gently. “Oh honey, I’m so sorry.”

“Promise me Jon. Never again.” She sobbed.

“I promise.” He replied, the tears he could no longer hold back leaving tracks down his face.


They sat like that for a long time, letting the healing begin. Finally, she raised her head and glanced at her watch, then at his face. “You need to get some sleep. You look like hell and you’ve got another show tonight.”

He rubbed a hand over his face. “I didn’t sleep very well last night. The couch in Richie’s room is too narrow and he wouldn’t share his bed. Plus, I had a throbbing head and cheek.” He looked down at her and quickly added. “Not that I didn’t deserve it! And Richie tells me that I should be thankful that I wasn’t hurting worse.”

He studied her face. “Did you get any sleep last night yourself?” She shook her head. He hesitated. “Will you come lay down with me? I just want to hold you.” She yawned widely and nodded. He smiled. “Just let me call Paul to cancel my interviews – or let Richie do them. And he can do sound check too.”

Without letting her go he fished out his cell phone and dialed. “Hey man. No, she didn’t kill me.” Lindsay smiled. “I need to cancel the interviews today or Richie or the guys will have to do them without me. No she didn’t clobber me again.” She chuckled. “They’ll have to do sound check without me too. Yes, I’ll be there in time for the show. And let everyone know not to call me unless it’s an absolute emergency. We were both up all night and we need to get some sleep. Yes, I’m sure it’s safe. No, I don’t think she’s going to smother me in my sleep. Alright, just a sec.” He handed her the phone. “Paul wants to talk to you.”

“Hi Paul.”

“Hi Lindsay. Everything okay? Do you need anything? A whip maybe?” He asked.

She laughed. “I’ll let you know when I’ve decided on his punishment. All I can think about right now is getting some sleep.”

“Ok, get some rest.” He paused. “I’m glad you’re sticking around. See you later.”

“See you Paul.” She closed the phone and handed it back to Jon.

Laying it on the table he stood and carried her into the bedroom where he laid her down. Swiftly stripping off his clothes, her removed her robe and climbed in beside her, pulling the covers over them. Gathering her in his arms he raised her face until he could softly kiss her lips. “Thank you.” He murmured. She nodded and curled more closely into him laying her hand over his heart. Within minutes they were both sound asleep.



Chapter 60

When they arrived at the arena, Jon paused at the door and took a deep breath.

“Worried about running into Chad?” She asked.

He snorted. “No.” He hesitated. “Tico. He was pretty pissed off at me last night.”

She grinned. “Ooooh, you riled up the Cubano! I’d be worried too.” She grabbed his hand and tugged. “Come on , I’ll protect you – he likes me.”

When the reached the dressing room door she knocked. “Female coming in.” She warned them before she opened the door.

The guys looked up and smiled as she walked in. They were spread out around the room. Richie had an acoustic guitar in his lap. “Hey Linds.” They chorused. The smiles faded when Jon walked in behind her.

She walked up to Tico and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you.”

He shrugged. “You’re family. We protect family – even from each other if one us is being a stupid asshole.” He glared in Jon’s direction.

Standing back she watched how this group of ‘brothers’ dealt with internal conflict.

Jon made eye contact, briefly, with each of them. “I want to apologize for my behaviour over the last few days, and particularly last night. I was way out of line. I’ve already apologized to Lindsay. She didn’t deserve any of it.” He looked at her. “I’m very happy to say that she’s agreed to stay and give me another chance.”

There was silence for a minute, then one by one, they all nodded. “You know that’s more than you deserve.” David commented. Jon nodded.

Tico caught his eye. “If you ever pull a stunt like that again, I will kick your ass.”

Jon nodded again. “And I’ll deserve it.”

Just then Obie stuck his head in the door. “Any word from J…oh good you’re here. We need the set list ASAP. Hey Lindsay.” He hesitated. “Everything okay? Or at least heading in the right direction?” She nodded. “Good. I was beginning to think that Jon had lost his mind completely, or had been possessed by some stupid, evil, mean, cruel demon.” And he was gone again.

Jon shook his head and smiled wryly. “Don’t hold back Ob, tell me how you really feel.” Walking over to a table he picked up a piece of paper and a pen. Sitting down he started writing. “Any special requests tonight?”

“Sorta gives new meaning to Living on a Prayer doesn’t it?” Hugh joked. They chuckled.

Something for the Pain? No wait, that would be if Lindsay were singing.” Tico commented. “How about Born to Be My Baby?”

If That’s What it Takes.” Richie supplied.

I’d Die For You.” Hugh added.

“Definitely Thank You For Loving Me.” Richie put in.

“I’m a Schmuk, I Fucked Up and I’m Sorry.” David contributed.

Richie looked at him grinning. “How does that one go again?” He started plucking out chords, making an almost funereal sound. They all laughed.

Tension eased, they all started their preparations for the show.

“How did the interviews go?” Jon asked Richie.

“Fine, they were disappointed that you weren’t there of course, but we just explained that you’d majorlly fucked up with your girlfriend and were desperately trying to get out of the doghouse.” He grinned. “They were all married. The men just nodded in understanding – one suggested flowers, another said jewelry. The women hoped you made it in time for the show and thought you should write her a love song – oh, and jewelry was definately a good idea.” He looked at Jon meaningfully.

Jon stared at him in disbelief.

Lindsay looked at Jon. “Did I mention that I’m partial to sapphires?” And she burst out laughing.

The show went off without a hitch. She couldn’t help grinning when Prayer started and Hugh looked down at her and winked. And they did do Thank You. Both Jon and Lindsay had tears in their eyes by the end. The fans saw Jon’s and went nuts.

Walking into the after party, Lindsay was a little nervous about running into Chad. But he seemed content to simply wave at her from the other side of the room. Relieved, she smiled and waved back.

Finished eating, she headed for the bar to get another drink. “I can’t believe that you’re staying with him.” A voice spoke from behind her.

Stiffening, she turned. “We talked it out. I love him. He loves me. You don’t throw that away because of one night.” She frowned at him. “Your behaviour was not exactly stellar either.”

“What did I do?” He tried to act innocent.

“Come on Chad. I may have been a little slow on the uptake, but I’m not stupid. You constantly tried to undermine my relationship with Jon. You knew he was jealous and you purposely did things to aggravate him. I just wished I’d noticed earlier. Maybe I could have prevented last night from happening.” She shook her head sadly. “I’ll just have to be more aware from now on. Now if you’ll excuse me I would like to join my friends.”

Approaching the table she noticed Jon watching her. Meeting his eyes she raised a brow. He smiled and this time it reached his eyes. She reached the table just as the D.J. was putting on a new song. Hearing it, she set her drink down and held her hand out to him. “Come dance with me.” He didn’t hesitate.

On the dance floor, in his arms, she smiled. “You really are on your best behaviour today.”

He raised a brow. “What makes you say that?”

“Because I know you don’t really like to dance, but you didn’t even hesitate.” She answered.

He shrugged. “I like this song.” He grinned at her. “Besides, I’ve been trying to get my hands on you all day, and this was the first time you seemed receptive.”

Smiling, she kissed him softly, leaned into him, laid her head on his shoulder and just absorbed the feel of his arms around her, his body next to hers and Big and Rich’s Lost in This Moment flowing around them.

When the song ended, by unspoken agreement, they gathered their things, said goodnight to the guys and headed for their room.

In their bedroom, he pulled her close, framed her face with his hands and just gazed at her for a long moment, stroking her bottom lip with the tip of his thumb. “God, how I love you!” He whispered fervently just before he lowered his head to replace his thumb with his tongue. Tracing her lips with the tip he inhaled her sigh as she opened for him and swept inside to taste her completely.

Lost in the sensation of his tongue stroking hers she reached out and gripped his waist to anchor herself. Feeling the cloth of his shirt she pulled up until she could slide her hands underneath and caress his skin enjoying how his muscles tightened in response to her touch.

Releasing her he stepped back and pulled his shirt over his head and threw it aside. Standing still he watched her face as she stroked the skin he had bared for her. The obvious pleasure showing there as much as the sensations her fingers evoked had his breath shortening and his pulse increasing. When she added lips and tongue to her assault, he closed his eyes, let his head fall back and groaned.

Lifting her head from where she’d been teasing a hard male nipple she grinned. “Oh, you like that do you?”

“Like I like breathing sugar.” He rasped out. Opening his eyes he looked down at her. Her breath caught at the desire she saw blazing there. “But now it’s my turn.” She gasped as her shirt was quickly drawn over her head and dropped to the floor. Her bra soon followed. Stepping closer, he gently held both her hands behind her back in one of his. With his free hand he caressed her from collarbone to waist over and over. Covering a breast, he kneaded firmly then teased the hard kernel at the peak, smiling as her back arched back giving him more access and pushing her breasts towards him, silently asking for more. Obliging, he cupped one breast raising the nipple towards his mouth. Bending his head he first licked then sucked her sensitive flesh.

Pulling her hands free of his hold, she tangled her fingers in his hair and pulled him closer. “Mmmm…..yes, Jon…. More…..please!”

“Oh you like that do you?” He repeated her words back to her, grinning as she gasped at the feel of his breath on her skin. Blowing lightly he increased the torture.

“Jon! Please!” She moaned.

Giving in to her plea went down on her breast in a slow tortuous suckle. She cried out. Feeling her legs start to buckle, he swept her up and carried her to the bed. Laying her down, he eased away from her to remove the rest of his clothes….and hers. Climbing back on the bed he carefully lowered himself on top of her, letting her feel his weight as he captured her mouth again.

Wrapping her arms around him she stroked his back, kneading the taut muscles. Opening her legs she reached down with both hands to caress and squeeze his buttocks trying to urge him where she most wanted to feel him. He resisted.

Lifting his head he murmured.” Not yet.” Raising up on his knees he sat back on his heels and looked at her lying flushed and open before him. Placing a hand on each of her knees he slowly caressed upwards. Holding her hip with one hand, with the other he teased her curls before lightly stroking her most sensitive flesh, then probing her gently. Feeling her wetness, he pressed first one, then two fingers deep inside her, massaged and watched her writhe.

“Mmmmm….Jon, please….I need to feel you!” She panted.

Glancing up he saw her watching him through slitted eyes, pleased with the hunger he saw there. Removing his fingers, he gripped her hips with both hands and lifted them onto his thighs. Sliding his hands up her back to help support her he groaned as she languidly arched her back more as she sat up.

Bracing one hand on his shoulder she slid the other down his chest and over his abs until she could wrap her fingers around him and squeeze firmly. Hearing him groan and feeling his fingers spasm on her hips, she smiled and set out to torture him a little more. Looking down she watched him swell even more as her fingers played. Stroking from base to tip, she circled the top with her thumb, spreading the drop he couldn’t hold back. He moaned.

“Sugar, enough…I need…” The breath was ripped from him on a ravaged moan as she raked her nails – very lightly – up his length and squeezed the tip firmly. His hips jerked in reflex.

“What do you need?” She purred.

“I need to be inside you.” He gasped. “Now!” Lifting her hips he moved her over him and she guided him home.

They both groaned as she slid slowly down until she was fully impaled. Wrapping her arms around his shoulders she took possession of his mouth as she began to rock against him. As the sensations increased so did her speed. But it wasn’t enough.

Wrenching her mouth from his she gasped. “Oh God….Jon…feels…so good…but….I ….need…more.”

Sliding his hands up her back to her shoulders he gripped and tipped her upper body back. Feeling him penetrate even deeper at this angle she leaned back even further, crying out at the feel of him so high inside her.

He would have chuckled, but he had no breath for it. He was holding on by a thread, but refused to let go until she did. Bending, he took a nipple into his mouth and suckled in time with the thrust of his hips. The twin sensations did it for her. He felt her spasm tight around him even before her scream rent the air. Pulling her upright again, he wrapped his arms tightly around her, grinding his hips against hers.

“Oh God Lindsay!” He cried out as his own release swamped him.

When he could breathe again, he lifted her gently off him, laid her down and curled around her.

“I love you.” He murmured in her ear, kissing her temple.

“I love you too.” She responded, turning her head to kiss him softly, before pulling his arm more snuggly around her waist, pressing back farther into him and drifting off to sleep.

Chapter 55

Entering the bar hand in hand they were immediately greeted by Paul.

“Hi Lindsay. Mind if I steal the boss here for a few minutes? There’s a couple of people I need him to talk to.”

“No problem. I’m going to go get a drink.” She turned to Jon. “Have you eaten?”

He shook his head. “No, but the guys will order up a feast for us.”

“Yeah, and we’ll grab a table.” David added.

She was sitting on a stool waiting for the bartender when Ryan came up and leaned on the bar beside her.

“Hi Lindsay.”

“Hi Ryan.” She replied. She was soon surrounded by the rest of his band. Ryan made the introductions.

“So Ryan tells us that you’re from Ontario.” Chad stated.

She nodded “Yeah, about and hour and half drive southwest of Toronto.”

“So tomorrow is like going home for you.” Chad noted. They were playing the Air Canada Centre the next night.

“Yeah, and I think my whole family is coming. My oldest nephew is a drummer in a band so Jon and Tico have offered to give him the full VIP tour.” She smiled.

“Well, if you need anything from us, just let me know.” He offered.

“Thanks, I may at least bring them around to me you if you don’t mind. I know at least a couple of them have seen you in concert a couple times, and would love to meet you.”

“Sure, no problem babe.” He answered.

They chatted for a while longer, about home, being on tour, music, then seeing Richie waving at her she grabbed her beer and slid off the stool. “Looks like my dinner has arrived. Nice to meet you guys. I’ll see you all later I guess.”

As she walked away Ryan looked at Chad. He recognized the look in his frontman’s eyes. “Hey man, she’s Bon Jovi’s woman.” He warned.

As they watched, Jon walked up to join Lindsay at the table, kissing her as he sat down.

“Yeah, but there’s no ring on her finger, so until she tells me otherwise, she’s fair game.” Chad declared.

Sitting down beside Lindsay, Jon reached for an onion ring. “I see you met Chad and the guys.”

“Yeah, they told me I could bring my family by to meet them tomorrow. They seem like nice guys.” She told him. He just grunted and reached for the nachos.

“Oh yeah, I’d almost forgot about the invasion of the Chandlers tomorrow.” Richie changed the subject. And the discussion turned to the various member’s of Lindsay’s family that they would meet the next day.

Sampling from the various plates spread over the table she turned to Jon. “You’re awful quiet. Something wrong?”

He shook his head. “Just a little tired I guess.”

“Well with the way you were running around the stage tonight, I’m not surprised.” She leaned in close. “Not too tired, I hope.” She placed her hand on his thigh and squeezed.

He grinned. “Sugar, I’m never that tired. What do you say we hurry up and eat and get out of here?”

“I’d say you read my mind.” She grinned back at him.

Ten minutes later they said goodnight to the guys and headed up to their room. Walking into the sitting room Lindsay dropped her purse on a table and started to take off her coat. Taking it from her he threw it on a chair, added his own, turned and swept her off her feet – literally. Ignoring her squeal of surprise he carried her into the bedroom and dropped her on the bed.

Standing beside the bed, eyes locked with hers, he started stripping off his clothes. Lips curving, she settled back to enjoy the show. Watching her watch him, he slowed down. Easing his now unbuttoned shirt off his shoulder he let it drop to the floor. Toeing off his boots he kicked them out of the way and reached for the button on his jeans. Slowly lowering the zipper he watched her eyes follow the movement. Pushing the denim over his hips and down his legs he stepped out of his jeans, and stood for a moment and let her look at him.

“Do I meet with your approval sugar?” He asked huskily.

“Mmmm. You always have darling. Only one thing would make it better.” She answered.

“What?”

“If you would come closer so that I can touch you.” She said softly.

Crawling onto the bed he straddled her waist, careful not to put all of his weight on her, just enough to pin her in place. Reaching out he slowly removed her halter top, threw it aside, and just looked at her for several minutes.

She could feel her skin heating under his gaze and her breasts swelling and firming, her nipples hardening. When she tried to touch him he shook his head and pinned her hands under his knees.

“Does that hurt?” He asked, not wanting to hurt her, just wanting her immobile and his hands free. She shook her head.

Reaching out with both hands he ran his fingertips lightly from her collarbone to her waist, watching the gooseflesh appear on her skin in his wake. “Are you cold?” He asked with a smile, as though he didn’t know what caused her reaction.

“No. I’m hot.” She answered closing her eyes to better focus on the sensations his hands were sending through her body.

He chuckled. “That you are sugar, that you are.”

He repeated his torture over and over, until she stifled a frustrated scream. “What’s the matter sugar? Don’t you like that?”

“Mmmm, it’s wonderful, but I need more.” She replied.

With a little half smile he cupped her breasts and circled the hard peaks with his thumbs….. over and over as her back arched trying to push her flesh more firmly into his hands. Understanding her unspoken request he obliged, tightening his grip and kneading for several minutes before backing off and squeezing her nipples sharply between thumb and forefinger. She cried out in pleasure.

Releasing her hands he moved off her to remove the rest of her clothing. When he had rendered her naked, he straddled her again – this time at her knees. Stroking her thighs lightly from knees to hips and back again he watched the muscles tighten and twitch. When she tried to sit up he placed a hand on her belly, holding her down. She growled in frustration.

Looking up at the sound he raised his brows. She glowered at him through slitted eyes. “I want to touch you too.”

“Later.” Was his only response as he resumed his stroking. She tried to buck him off, but only succeeded in making him chuckle.

Her skin felt like it was on fire and only his touch could soothe it. He was driving her insane. If he didn’t end the torture soon she was going to go up in flames.

Finally relenting he rose up, parted her legs and knelt in between, sitting back on his heels and just looked at her lying open before him. One fingertip nuzzled through her curls, stroking her sensitive bud. Her legs flexed involuntarily, opening her even more for his touch, her hips arching, asking for more.

“Jon! Please!” She panted.

“Too much?” He teased.

“Not enough!”

Leaning forward he braced his hands on either side of her shoulders. Bending he touched his lips to hers making sure that his chest didn’t touch hers. Licking and sucking he teased her until in frustration she bit him. Chuckling he gave in and captured her mouth thrusting deeply with his tongue.

Hands free and his body within reach she took full advantage. Stroking his back from shoulders to hips, she slid her hands around and stroked back up his chest, curling her fingers through his fur and teasing his nipples.

Groaning, he lowered himself on top of her bracing his torso on his elbows. Releasing her mouth he moved lower, licking her breasts, then blowing on them lightly before taking the tips in his mouth and suckling.

Her hips were undulating against his trying to urge him where she wanted him most. “Jon, please! You’re killing me!” She begged.

“What is it you want sugar?” He teased.

“I need you! I need to feel you inside me!” She sobbed.

“Like this?” He filled her in one quick stroke and then held still.

She gasped at his sudden entry, “Mmmm Yes!” Frustrated when he didn’t move and unable to help herself, her hips ground against him.

Raising his head he watched her. Her head was thrown back, eyes closed, the pleasure she felt at the feel of him inside her clearly visible on her face. Suddenly, she went rigid and cried out. He could feel the spasms of her release gripping him. Unable to remain motionless, he started to move…slowly at first in deference to her recent climax. He watched the expression on her face change from ecstasy to surprise to intense passion.

“Oh God! Jon! Mmmmm yes! I need more!” Tossing her head from side to side she strained to reach the peak.

He slowed his rhythm. He wanted to see how high he could take her, although he wasn’t sure how much more he could take himself. His heart was pounding and he was gasping for breath.

“Noooooo!” She wailed. Raising her legs she wrapped them tightly around his waist pulling him deeper into her.

“God Lindsay! I’m not sure who’s killing who here!” He rasped.

Forcing her eyes open she locked them with his. The hunger and desperation he saw there almost did him in. When she raked her nails down his back he groaned and was lost. Thrusting deeper, harder he sent her over the edge, and watched her eyes go blank with the force of her pleasure.

Shutting his eyes, he lowered himself to lie fully upon her and with his next thrust found his own piece of heaven.

Rolling off her, he gathered her close. She looked up at him in wonder, her heart still pounding. Raising one still trembling hand she stroked his face. “God how I love you! What you make me feel!” She shivered “I don’t ever want to lose that.”

“I love you too. And you’re not going to lose me.” He hugged her closer and kissed her gently. As she relaxed against him and drifted off to sleep he pressed his lips to her forehead. “You’re MINE!”



Chapter 56


She woke the next morning to the feel of Jon’s mouth nuzzling her neck, then her lips. When she murmured approvingly he teased her mouth open and kissed her thoroughly. Then he stopped and pulled away.

“Come on honey, shake a leg, we’ve got a plane to catch!” He grinned at her disgruntled look.

Narrowing her eyes at him, she reached out and grabbed a handful of his shirt – he was already dressed – and yanked him close. Kissing him she ran a hand down the front of his pants and stroked him until she could feel him getting hard against her hand. He groaned. Pushing him back she climbed out of bed and headed for the bathroom. At the door she looked back to find him watching her in disbelief.

“The next time you wake me like that you better be prepared to finish what you start or reap the consequences!” She turned and headed for the shower.

Boarding the plane she took a few minutes to explore. Curious she opened a door at the back and discovered it was a bedroom. Looking back at Jon who had been watching her, she raised a brow.

He shook his head. “Flight’s too short.” He chuckled at her look of disappointment.

Arriving in Toronto, they stopped at the hotel for a quick lunch then headed to the arena for sound check. They had dropped off their coats in the dressing room and were heading towards the stage when a young girl’s voice echoed down the hallway.

“JON!”

He turned and barely had time to brace himself before the girl plowed into him, hugging his waist. “Hi there sweetie.” The guys stood there stunned until they realized that Lindsay was just shaking her head.

“A relative of yours?” Richie asked.

She nodded. “My niece. Alexis, let him go now. He has to go to work.” She gently pulled the girl away.

“Can I watch?” Alexis asked.

“Sure. You can sit with me.” Her aunt replied.

The rest of Lindsay’s family had caught up with them now. Lindsay made the introductions and within minutes Tico took Kevin off for a VIP tour of the stage set up…particularly his drum kit.

Lindsay led the rest of them around to the seats in front of the stage so that they could all watch.

Looking around Lindsay checked on her various family members. Her Dad and Nick were in deep conversation with Obie as he explained the sound board and what he was doing, Kevin was on stage with Tico who was letting him try out his kit, Craig was checking out Richie’s various guitars under Al’s eagle eye, and the girls were all sitting in chairs in front of the stage listening and watching.

A movement in the doorway had her looking that way. Smiling, she waved as Nickelback came in and joined them while they were waiting for their turn. Lindsay introduced the girls to them and pointed out the rest of her family. When Craig saw them he immediately rushed down to meet them.

On the stage Richie watched the laughing group in the seats in front of them. Glancing at Jon he sighed. Walking over to him he murmured. “Relax man, they’re just talking.”

“I know.” Came the curt reply. He never took his eyes off the scene before him. “Hey Ob! You got what you need?” He called out. Obie gave the thumbs up.

Handing their guitars to the techs Jon and Richie joined the others and left the stage. Lindsay gathered up her family, waved at Nickelback and herded them out into the hallway and down to the dressing room where the guys were waiting for them.

Walking in the room she saw Jon sitting in a chair and the others spread around the room. Sensing something was wrong she went to stand behind his chair and watched her family settle in the room chatting with various band members. Putting her hands on his shoulders she could feel how tense he was. Massaging gently, she leaned down to murmur in his ear. “What’s wrong?”

Reaching up to pat her hand he shook his head. “Nothing.”

She frowned. “Jon...”

Just then Alexis came up and sat on Jon’s lap. “That was cool, but when’s the real show?”

He smiled. “It starts about 7:30, but we don’t go on stage until about 9.”

She sighed. “So what do you do until then?”

“Well, this is when we usually do some interviews, and just relax until it’s time to get ready for the show.” He answered.

“Do you have interviews today?” she asked.

He nodded. “Yeah, in a little while.”

“Can I watch?”

“Lex, I don’t think that’s...” Lindsay began.

Jon interrupted. “Sure you can, but you have to be very quiet.”

In between interviews, the guys patiently answered the continuous stream of questions the Chandler’s seemed to have. When Lindsay apologized they just smiled and told her relax.

When it got close to show time, the kids started to get anxious.

“Come on, let’s go take our seats before someone else does.” Craig urged.

“Relax Craig, security won’t let anyone take our seats.” Lindsay assured him. When the others joined in she gave in. “Okay, let’s go.” She laughed as she watched them all but run out the door.

“Where are you going?” Jon caught her hand.

“To watch the show with my family.” She replied. “I’ll come back before you go on. After all I’ll need to do a costume check.” She winked at David who flipped her off.

“By the way Linds. There’s a lock on the bathroom door here.” David informed her. “Just thought you might want to know.”

It was her turn to flip him off. Red faced she turned to catch up with her family.


During the break she entered the room to find them all dressed and going through their warm up routines.

“Where’s everyone else?” Tico asked.

“They’re still out there saving the seats.” Lindsay laughed. “I couldn’t convince them that they would be safe. Kevin is prowling around the stage. He said you told him he could watch from up there.”

Tico nodded. “Yeah. I got a spot for him where he can see things from my perspective.”

“You mean he gets to look at Jon’s ass all night.” Hugh said. They all laughed.

“Hey, that’s mine!” Lindsay reminded them, grabbing it to illustrate her point.

Laughing, Jon hugged her. “You can have it anytime you want sugar.” He murmured in her ear before kissing her.

Relieved that he seemed relaxed again, she walked to the stage door with them, wished them luck and headed for her seat.

The show was amazing as usual and Lindsay’s family was impressed – even her parents. While the music wasn’t their style they could appreciate the showmanship and the effort it took. Her sisters-in-law just watched Jon in awe and shot envious looks in Lindsay’s direction. She just laughed. The rest just rocked out.

Stopping backstage briefly she let Jon know that she was heading back to the hotel with her family. The after party was being held in the bar there. “We’ll meet you there.”

He frowned. “Why don’t you wait here?”

“The kids are too impatient. There’s more to keep them occupied at the hotel.” She replied. Stepping close and sliding one hand into his sweaty hair, she pulled him down for a deep kiss. “Don’t be too long.”


Back at the bar, the kids immediately headed for the pool tables while the adults headed for the bar. A buffet would be set up shortly, but the hotel was waiting for the band to arrive. Lindsay introduced everyone to Paul and the other people from BJM that were there. About twenty minutes later, Chad and the guys came in.

“Hey Lindsay.” Chad greeted her as he joined her at the bar.

“Hi Chad. That was a great show.” She complimented him.

“Thanks. I’m glad you enjoyed it.” He replied.

“Hey Chad how about a game?” Ryan suggested.

“In a minute.” Chad answered.

Lindsay smiled. “If you want to play you better grab a table now before my nephews take over.” She advised.

Walking over with them she watched the games going on for awhile until a commotion at the door told her that Jon and the guys had arrived. Looking at her watch she smiled.

“That was fast.” She commented as she reached them, sliding her arm around Jon’s waist. He hugged her close to his side.

“For once we didn’t have to wait for Jon. He was the first one ready.” David responded. “I guess being with us in the bathroom just wasn’t the same.”

Closing her eyes she hid her face in Jon’s shirt. He just laughed and looked at David. “You’re right about that man….not even close”

The food was out and everyone settled in to eat. Shortly after, her family said their thank yous and goodbyes and headed for home.

After seeing them off Lindsay and Jon headed back into the bar where Richie challenged Jon to a game of pool.

Lindsay was standing to the side watching and laughing at Richie’s antics trying to distract Jon, when Chad joined her.

“You’re family gone?” He asked.

“Yeah. I wanted to thank you for being so patient with them. And the kids really appreciated the autographs and pictures. They could hardly wait to get home and tell their friends all about their day of hanging out with rockstars!” she laughed.

“No problem. I was glad to do it.” He smiled at her.

“Hey honey, would you mind getting me a drink?” Jon called.

“Sure. Richie you want one too?” She asked.

“Please.” He nodded.

All three men watched her walk away. Jon turned to Chad.

“I see you’re getting pretty chummy with Lindsay.” He commented.

Chad shrugged. “Just talking. She’s from home. Gives us common ground. That’s a hell of a woman you’ve got there.”

Jon nodded. “I know. Better than you.”

The two men stared at each other for a long moment.

“Here.” Lindsay handed Richie his drink and approaching Jon handed him his.

“Well, I think I’ll see if there’s any food left.” Chad stated and wandered off.

Turning to Jon she raised a brow at him. “What was that all about?”

“What? Nothing.” He replied.

“Oh come on, you could practically smell the testosterone in the air.” She said dryly.

“Really, it was nothing.” He kissed her lightly and turned back to the table.

She looked at Richie for an explanation. He just shook his head and rolled his eyes. “Frontmen.” Was his only comment.

The game finished, Jon laid his arm across her shoulders. “Ready to go?”

Laying her head on his shoulder she nodded. Pausing to say goodnight to everyone, they headed upstairs to their room.

His phone rang as the door shut behind them. Sighing he answered it. Understanding from his side of the conversation that it was some scheduling issue Lindsay headed for the bedroom. Coming out of the bathroom after getting ready for bed she found Jon lying naked on the bed, the covers pulled down to the foot.

“Don’t you think it’s a little cool to sleep like that?” She teased.

He grinned at her. “I figured you’d warm me.”

“Oh you did, did you?” She climbed on the bed beside him.

Reaching out he quickly divested her of her nightgown and dropped it over the side of the bed. Gathering her in his arms he rolled her beneath him.

Wrapping her arms around his neck she opened her mouth to his questing tongue. Sighing in appreciation she tangled hers with his as they tasted each other.

Raising up on one elbow he set his other hand to roaming her body. Cupping one breast he kneaded gently and tweaked her nipple. Releasing her mouth he moved to ear and softly sucked on her earlobe. She shivered. Sliding his mouth down to her neck he continued sucking.

Running her hands up and down his back she lightly raked him with her nails. Chuckling he moved down her body, pausing to explore her breasts with his lips and tongue. Taking her hard nipples into his mouth he raked them with his teeth before soothing them with his tongue, moving back and forth between them.

Tangling her hands in his hair she pulled him against her and arched her back, pressing her breast more firmly against him. “Please” She murmured.

Obliging, he took first one than the other deeper in his mouth and suckled them – hard. She cried out at the pleasure that was shooting through her with every pull of his mouth.

Lifting his head slightly he licked a path down over her belly, teasing her navel until he reached the juncture of her thighs. Easing her legs apart he settled between them and stroked her first with his fingers, then with his tongue.

Gasping for breath, she writhed beneath him, her hips arching towards him begging for more.

“Mmmm, yes,…. oh God Jon,….yes, right there…mmm.mm….more!”

Gripping her hips with both hands he held her still as he penetrated her with his tongue, delving deep inside her.

She moaned, her head thrashing from side to side. Biting her lip her whole body shuddered at his ministrations. Grabbing his shoulders she pulled.

“Jon, please, I want to touch you.” She gasped.

Raising his head slightly he murmured. “No” And went back to work. Just before she reached the peak he stopped.

Groaning in frustration she opened her eyes to look at him. “Now you stop?!” She growled in disbelief.

Chuckling he slid his body slowly up hers, never breaking contact. When they were chest to chest, he moved his sideways back and forth abrading her sensitive nipples with his chest hair.

“Jon you’re killing me!” Arching her back she groaned.

“But what a way to go, sugar.” He smiled.

“You’re going to be going first if you don’t give me what I need!” she threatened.

He laughed. “And just what is it that you need sweetheart?” He nibbled on her ear as his hips slowly rocked teasing her.

“Mmmm, that…that’s what I need…..only…inside me….deep inside me.” Gripping his head with both hands she forced him to look her in the eye. “Now!” She growled.

Grinning he swooped down to capture her mouth again and gave her what she wanted. Pumping her slowly he savoured the feel of her tight around him.

“God sugar you feel good.” He groaned.

In response she squeezed him internally in rhythm with his thrusts. Moaning, he moved faster. Feeling her tense beneath him he thrust harder, deeper, driving into her, pushing her over the edge. Her screams echoing around them, he collapsed on her, shuddering with his own pleasure.




Chapter 57

The next few days were an exercise in frustration and aggravation for Lindsay. Jon’s moods were up and down like a yo-yo and unpredictable. She knew that something was bothering him, but when she asked, he kept saying he was fine. She pretty much decided that if this is what he was like on the road, she’d just as soon stay home.

Even the tenor of his love making had changed. While he still doled out pleasure unstintingly, he wouldn’t let her return the favour. He wasn’t rough, but he was more intense and, well, possessive was the only way she could describe it. Like he was continually staking his claim.

One morning she was getting out of the shower when she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror.

“What the hell?” She exclaimed, leaning closer to see more clearly. She had a ring of love bites around her collarbone like a necklace. “Dammit Jon!” she yelled.

He appeared in the doorway. “That’s the matter?”

She turned to face him so that he could see his handiwork.

He smirked.

She glared.

“What are you so mad about? That I did it or that you didn’t feel me doing it?” He laughed.

“So you admit that you did it on purpose?” She asked in disbelief.

He shrugged. “Well, the first two were accidents, but then I kind of liked the way they looked, so I kept going.”

Pushing past him she stomped over to her suitcase and started rummaging.

“What are you looking for?” He asked.

“To see if I brought a turtleneck.” She replied curtly.

“What? And hide my artwork?” He grinned and raised his hands in reflex to catch the shoe she threw at him.


Meeting up with the rest of the guys in the lobby she didn’t bother to hide her feelings. Holding her coat closed around her neck and stalking past them without a word, she climbed into the van. Gazing from her glare to Jon’s smirk, Richie sighed.

“What’d you do this time bro?” He asked.

Jon just grinned and climbed into the van.

When they arrived at the arena, Lindsay headed straight for their dressing room, threw her coat down and waited for the comments – she hadn’t packed a turtleneck, she hadn’t thought she’d need one.

Richie looked at her, caught Jon’s eye and just shook his head. Jon shrugged.

“Nice necklace Linds.” David commented.

She gave him the finger.

“Ah come on honey, don’t be mad. It’s not that bad.” Jon tried to hug her, but she pushed him away.

“Don’t touch me!” She grouched and plopped into a chair.

“What’s so bad about it?” He asked “I would have thought you’d have been flattered that you drove me to such a peak of passion.”

She glared at him. “It’s one thing if it happens during a ‘peak of passion’ as you call it. But it’s something entirely different if IT’S DONE ON PURPOSE! I feel branded, like an animal!” He looked surprised.

She stayed in the dressing room until show time. She didn’t want anyone to see her. But by the time they took the stage, she had calmed down and David and Richie had managed to tease her into a better mood. Not about to deny herself the pleasure of watching them in action she took her usual spot in front of the stage.

Trying to get back in her good books, Jon came to her side often, shaking his ass at her, smiling, winking, anything he could think of to get her to smile at him. They played several off her favorites list, and although it was difficult, she kept a straight face, just shaking her head at his antics, not ready to let him off the hook so easily.

The clincher came though when he looked at her, sighed, and called the guys into a huddle. When they broke he walked back to the mike and she heard the opening of You Had Me From Hello. She sighed to herself. She knew she was in trouble. She really couldn’t stay mad at him long, particularly when he sang love songs like that one, which happened to be one of her favorites. Watching him, hearing the lyrics that always tugged on her heart strings, seeing the look in his eyes when they locked with hers, she felt the last of her anger drain away. As the last note echoed he looked at her and raised his brows. Unable to help herself she smiled at him. His answering smile was a full wattage one that had the girls behind her commenting. “I wish he’d smile at me like that!”

When he came off the stage and saw her he grinned. She sighed in exasperation.

“Now I know why it’s so hard to have a relationship with a singer/songwriter.” She grouched.

“Why?” He laughed.

“Because it’s too easy for them to get out of the doghouse. They just pull out a song like that, my heart melts, and I can’t stay angry.” She replied.

“Lucky me.” He pulled her close and kissed her thoroughly. “I am sorry you know.”

She looked at him for a moment. “No you’re, not. But that’s okay, just remember, payback’s a bitch. It may take awhile, but I will get even.”

He laughed. “I’m sure you will sugar.”

Arriving at the after party Lindsay headed for the bar and once again was joined by Chad.

“Hi Lindsay, I haven’t seen you all day. You been hiding?” He greeted her.

“Hi Chad. Yeah, sort of. I’ve was in the dressing room until they went on stage.” She answered, turning to face him.

He immediately noticed her ‘necklace’. She noticed where he was looking.

“Don’t say a word.” She ordered.

He raised his hands up, palm out in a defensive gesture. “I wouldn’t dream of it babe.”

Just then Jon joined them. The two men looked at each other. Chad smiled wryly. Jon smirked.

Watching the by-play between the two, Lindsay shook her head in disgust. “Men!” Grabbing her beer she went to join Richie and the others at a table.